By Neil Phillips.
A long time ago, I required surgery on my right wrist. I expected things would change while recovering, but I wasn’t ready for what happened. My cast went from above the elbow to the very end of my fingertips. I could do nothing with my right hand. Being right-handed, this was a problem. I couldn’t work a button, zipper, or cut my food. Eventually, I learned, and I was never as good with my left hand as I was with my right.
The same lesson is true for everyone. You need to be yourself and stay there. I’ve given several presentations on self-coaching. And the one idea that consistently gets the most significant nods stands out: Remember Who You Are.
We often engage with a coach to transform our lives. We start self-improvement courses to change our lives. We have accountability partners to make sure we don’t fall. What we forget is that we spent 20 years or 30 years or longer becoming who we are. I love to read and plan and push boundaries to create new systems. That’s who I am. I’ll never be the one to WOO (win others over). The problem happens when I forget who I am. Actually, there are two problems when I forget that. I don’t become very good at what I want and worse at what I do well.
Try a little self-experiment sometime so you can learn the lesson I did. Switch your knife and fork. You will become midling good with the reversed instruments. After a couple of weeks, switch back. You will then be only so-so with your natural method. Your natural method will come back easier than it was learning the reverse, but in the meanwhile, you’ve lost some of your natural ability.
Self-coaching is a great topic. It sounds antithetical for a practicing coach to tell people they can do coaching without paying the big bucks, but it works. You can do an enormous amount of self-coaching when you focus on it.
How do you remember who you are?
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