By Dana Phillips.
There are certainly as many obstacles to success as there are paths to greatness. One that keeps presenting itself to many of our clients is a barrier I call “the yardstick game.” Instead of measuring progress, we often compare ourselves with others.
The rules aren’t complicated in the yardstick game. You are either better or worse than someone else. This can be in sales, golf, weight loss, intelligence, or even parenting. Sometimes it makes you feel good, “I am so much better than him.” Sometimes you feel justified, “Well, I’m not as bad off as she is.” Occasionally you are challenged, “I am going to be as skilled as he is.” More often, you feel dejected, “I will never be as good as they are.”
It started when we were young. Were you in the bunny reading group, the jets, or the turtles? Certainly, teachers did not intend to label you as a slow reader. Your parents, who wished you were “more like your brother” were not planning to reinforce the rules of the game.
Here is the truth about the yardstick game. You will never win if you play. Instead, you will spend so much time playing that you will miss the one true standard by which you are to be measured. God only made one yardstick with your name on it. It is in your backyard, and you don’t have to measure up to anyone else’s yardstick.
Overcoming this obstacle produces an extraordinary victory. When you decide to stop playing the yardstick game, your mind must do something else to occupy itself. You are forced to focus on your progress compared to your strengths, your talents, and your performance. Your mind will be drawn to improvement, a celebration of milestones, and a vision of the next step. There is an extraordinary victory in the alternative. There is freedom in concentrating on measuring your progress, enhancing your performance, and being your best.
Here is a challenge. Look back over the last few days or weeks. Identify when you have played the yardstick game. Decide to stop playing and give yourself a point every time you choose to think of another way to measure yourself.
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